so cold

I was at a bus stop waiting for the bus, when a homeless guy approached me with the ever expected question, '"can you spare some change, please?"
i replied, "no I don't have any money." He looked at me with disbelief as if I was mocking him and said slightly angrily, " that's what you people always say!" I stood up as my bus arrived and I said ".. that's because you guys spend it on alcohol and drugs."
He grew defensive and got in my face and replied, "no I'm not drunk. I just want a 50p drink."
" you look very drunk to me." I responded, taking couple steps back as he got aggressive.
" I'm sorry, I don't have any money. I swear to God." I quickly said as I got on the bus.
He shouted, "remember you swore by God!" I felt so guilty because I didn't any money except loose change which was less than 50p. I contemplated on getting of the bus and giving him that little change, as I felt I was harsh and judgmental. There was no need to add insult to the injury.


I don't know his predicament and what he went through, therefore, I had no right to have said what I said. A friend of mine who works with mentally ill people, told me that many homeless people  have mental illness. It is a cold world, and it is us people who have made it bitterly cold.

shame on me. I thought I was better than that.

May Allah forgive me for being ungrateful and may Allah shelter the homeless on these cold nights. My heart goes out to the homeless, especially on these freezing, winter nights.